Should I keep 'Trying' ?

Should I keep trying ?
Should I keep crying ?
When I'm tired of falling down,
Still, should I keep trying ?

Lies and Lies, 
All my life, I have been buying.
back stabbing and disloyalty, 
every time, fidelity was rewarded with treachery.
Still, on every moment, I tried complying.
Still, should I keep trying ?

Eyes and Eyes,
Not watching out but, prying.
wherever I go, I face 'Faces',
pointed fingers and big mouths.
It breaks my heart, I'm just dying.
Still, should I keep trying ?

Problem and Problems,
Like a Mountain they stand, looks horrifying .
Nothing seems okay, nothing is Fine.
I'm in between, around me, darkness is solidifying.
Still, should I keep trying ?
 
I thought a lot,
to find out, "Should I keep trying ?"
and my 'Inner' replied,
Yes, you should try.
You should keep trying.


You are a 'Alive'
You are 'Breathing', 'Walking'.
You are not dead, So don't stop trying.

Let people spying, 
to bring you down, every trick they are trying.
Let problems block your way,
to stop you in between, they are plying. 

But,
If you stop here, you are letting them win
leaving to you million of reasons for crying.

And, I know
You are strong,
You are better than many.
Let them hate you,
You are your 'Hero'

You just,
Believe in your dreams,
Have faith in your capacity
You are so close to meet your life.

Just keep trying,
Don't ask "Should I keep trying ?"
rather say, "I'll keep trying till I get you and make you Mine".

A movie to Remember

2nd October, A day for celebrating Gandhi Jayanti yearly. The gazette clearly states in Annexure I that Gandhi Jayanti continues to be a public holiday. Today I and my friends were all enthralled not because It was our Bapu's ( Mahatma Gandhi’s) birthday but because it was Friday and Matt Damon’s latest movie “The Martian“ got released for which we had booked tickets. I reckon nobody wants to miss its first show.

We rushed to the theatre and reached just one minute before the movie started (lucky we were today).

Though we knew it would happen (checked the reviews beforehand) but just after first five minutes we were totally engrossed into the movie. Trust me if you are science-fiction movie maniac then you should watch it. It’s worth every single dime you spend for tickets

It was almost pin drop silence all around me, no clapping, no one’s giggling, not a single diversion nothing. Though, I could hear people whispering from here and there but it was the least of a distraction. We all were adoring the performance by the cast, admiring the VFX, savouring the taste of a science fiction movie and congratulating Matt Damon deep down in our hearts for terrific acting as usual. What’s the journey if it's doesn’t have adventure in it and the moment came when the silence around us got broken by the shrieking voice of a baby and the whole place got distracted by the commotion. Seeing the people staring at them, the family rushed to the exit door.  After a while, they came back and started trying to catch the pace of the movie. They barely sat for 15 minutes and the baby started crying again and this time the count of eyes staring at them was twice the last time. The couple rushed to the exit door again and this time they didn't come back.    

After one and half hour, the movie ended, we all were satisfied with the plot of the movie and started exiting the door with one sentence in mind “ We did not waste anything neither our time nor the money, it was worth it  dude“

But what's about the couple who had left the movie in between. They didn’t even sit for 30 minutes for the movie for which they paid 250 bucks per head. Have they wasted their money because of their kid? I don’t know if they should put the blame on the kid for crying or the spectators there who started glaring at them with big eyes and wanted them to leave the place at once.

Or I guess couples who have kids should not come for watching movies if they can't keep them silent for 2 hours after all they just can't kill the pleasure which other people were getting or waste the money they had invested in tickets.
But this is what I think. Nobody knows but them how it feels to have a kid and a life with a kid around. How they put their wishes on the second point keeping their kids on first. Maybe I’ll get to know all these strange feelings, the weight of being a parent, a sense of responsibility when I have a kid of my own. Until then I’m gonna enjoy my bachelor’s moments to the fullest.

5 minutes on Traffic Signal

  “ Cars and Cars everywhere but none of them was moving :P :P “

Anyone who has lived in Bangalore even for a day will comprehend exactly what I meant by above line :P :P

Day before yesterday I encountered one terrible traffic congestion  and atrocity increased when it started raining at once. People were plunging to the dryest corners, Cars  around me started honking the horn at fullest and I started experiencing bittersweet emotion. Happy I was because of the car in which  not even  a single raindrop could touch me and sad because this traffic stood up against my patience level. There was  too much commotion on the road, everything seemed to be going haywire and worst happened when I couldn't hold my patience and started grumbling about everything crossing my mind.

Things would have been under control if I had carried the umbrella with me. Had I been walking than I would have taken the footpath and reached my place by now. Why people are blaring horn, can’t they see it’s not helping at all. What's wrong with my mobile, why its battery dying now.Last month I should have bought new mobile when dad told me to by one, God what’s wrong with the network…. Oh fuck, I’ll be late for the gym today. I guess I should buy a brand new bike next month then I’ll be able to avoid all this traffic crap. Oh wow, they opened up new Baskins Robbins ice cream parlor in our block, I must go now  and eat but holy shit I’m trapped here in this cab among shitloads of people on road who can’t just stop honking their horn……. BLAH … BLAH …. BLAH.

and with this a giant gale of questions started rolling out in me but suddenly I heard a tapping sound on the window pane. At the back of my mind I thought who can be tapping at this time and to find out this, I brought down the window pane a little and found a small boy over there holding a bunch of pens in his hand and asking me to buy one. He was a kiddo, drenched from tip to toe, shivering like hell but determined to sell his pens to me or anyone. Though I couldn’t offer him the seat in my car ( may be because he didn't want it ) but bought one pair of the pen. I gave him money and in return he waved a smile at me and moved to next car.

After this event, suddenly the rumbling gale in me came to peace as if it got everything. No more questions were striking hard my mind’s wall. Instantly I found a complete peace as if I got everything from those “TWO PENS”

Alice and Bob

Hey, Alice ! look over there
Look there is something nice
Behind the black curtains
A hidden magnificent beauty lies

Bob, I'm not getting anything
please elaborate it a bit more.
What's that black curtain,
the beauty you are talking about is pure?

Oh Alice, you are nuts
okay! Listen to me closely.
I will explain everything and
you will understand this beauty solely

Alice, Look at those black holes
As dark as black coal
no matter if you try to escape
they will attract your complete soul

Just in between
there is a thin small hump
perfect in shape
unlike mine, it's a fine lump

below that hump
just notice that two petal
delicate and smooth in nature
but the touch of it can melt hard metal

Oh Bob !!!!!!
stop it, I just don't get it
don't make twisted talk
end my agony, tell me, just spit it.

Okay Okay Alice
listen in plain word
but keep it with you
I don't want it to be heard.

Those Blackholes
They are two black eyes
God knows better but
Thousands of secret they hide

That little hump
It's a nose
petals are lips
part of beautiful rose

Most important thing
which has a flair
that black curtain
Oh ... sorry not curtains but  hair
which hide this beauty carefully
everything is just amazing, I swear !!!

What are you doing in my Nightmares ?

Yesterday I had a dream
a strange dream
It seemed to tell me something
but now I wonder what?
It wanted me to prepare myself
but still no clue for what?

I never had such dream before
So weird and terrifying
Full of hate and agony
Brimmed with darkness and pain
So dull and lifeless dream

This dream took me somewhere
Somewhere I never had been before
A withered place, completely hostile
It was alien to me
I don’t know what does it all mean ?

Everything there was withered
Clouds were roaring at fullest
Wind was rushing to somewhere
Every twig was shaking
Everything just strange
Seriously beyond my thoughts range

But wait
In that commotion
I saw two shadows
Dark aggressive and compact
flooded with terror
one of them was a boy
another one was a girl

One of them was loud like hell
chanting at high pitch
its over! It's over! It's over!

Those three words didn’t make any sense
but I kept listening
She was shouting aimlessly
Words were shattering the poor lad’s soul
Stabbing his body ruthlessly

He cried
He begged
but the poor chap
His words had no effect on lady
She was blinded with vanity
Failed to see another side

Time was flying
both of them were arguing
and finally
it came to end with parting words


But I was curious to know
Who were they, Why am I dreaming about them
I stepped forward and got closer
Looked at two and lost my sense


What I saw was bolt from blue
Only thing came out of me was

“No god please, Oh my god please, Don’t do this”

How can it be possible
Two shadows which got separated were my girl and me

God, what is this all about?
what do you want to say?
We are doing great but
why do you want to end it this way?

Fighting with my own demons
I woke up and cried
now I'm not dreaming but still this thought haunting me
the thought of separating from her is putting me on fire

I don’t know why I dreamed it
I never had one like this before and never want to have one in future.

Work in old age is Choice or Obligation ?

                

“Bhaiya Pani Lado”

After devouring spicy food , All i wanted was a glass of water .To calm down the fire being set up by the spices,i just kind of  shouted those three words but what happened next shooked me for quite a long time and rendered me speechless with one question constantly hitting my mind then and even now which is not yet answered to the satisfaction neither by me nor by the people around.

Nowadays I guess we all need a break from the moribund city life to breathe in some

moment of everlasting peace and boundless beauty. We all work and it's good to join the “Working” club but sometimes overworking gets on nerves and starts eating up your life. I guess we were victim of the same parasite therefore to get the seclusion from work we went to one of the nature’s abode “Coorg”

Exhausted and all drained, We reached the landing-place after eight hours of journey. Pangs of hunger forced us to rush into the restaurant then seeking shelter to recreate our lost energy and there  we ordered like a famished kid and ate like a hungry wolf .While some of us were burping, some were burning from inside because of the spices they added to the food and to bring down this fire, i asked for water or i should say out of little tune i shouted for water. After a while, A lady more than sixty year old came and stood by my side with a water jug in her hands ( I guess to calm down not my thirst but the anger-tune with which i demanded water).

I guess her very presence shut off everything running inside me and water was the one last thing i could think of at that time .After pouring water she left and we began talking.

friend 1 :- I wonder, Why does she has to work in this age ?

me :- Simple she has no one else to take care of her. Just to make both ends meet she is working.

friend 2 :- It might be possible that she just work for her own reasons which might not be money always?

friend 1 :- What can be the reason behind working other than earning money to live.

friend 2 :- It's not always money, some people work for keeping their body healthy. Some are so workaholics that they can't sit idle.

me :- I don't think anybody will work in his/her 60s for fun or sake of good health. At Least i will not do it.

friend 2 :- My grandpa has crossed his 70s and still work. He travels everyday almost 60km. In his own words “ I’ll fall sick if i sit on bed and stop doing everything ”.

and this discussion kept on going for a while.

But while coming back from one hell of a trip , one question struck me hard with the fragile image of that old lady wrapped in shabby saree .She was there with pretended smile, her eyes were gleaming but the glare was not coming from within. Her hands were constantly moving but they were not strong enough to bear the heavy load of dishes on tables. Veins were popping out of her hand’s lean muscles. I know she is working there because of her own choice but her frail body was yelling completely different story. God knows why is  she into this business but i’m sure her reasons must be painful and shattering .

I still don't  understand the existent of this thing in the society.On one side my friend’s grandfather is working in his 70’s just to remain fit and on the other side this woman is working to earn one time bread. Just like them there are many others who are trapped in this tough world. 

“Work in Old age is Choice or Obligation ?” , this question still itches in my mind and i couldn't stumble upon the perfect answer yet. I mean if it's a choice then what's the force that drives them crazy enough to discount all the leisure and comforts which they can get from their peers and encourage them to tread the path which requires strength and if it's a obligation then why is it so ? why nobody’s doing anything to remove such commitments from the world.
I still don't get it but i will always be curious to know the answer .  

I was fooled Again

I waited endlessly
for the sun to shine bright
My eyes were open
to witness its first light

Couldn’t sleep for a second
Kept thinking about it
Didn't want to miss anything
So woke up whole night

What will i do ?
When tomorrow, Sun will smile
Made plans whole night
to make those moments mine

But
It wasn’t like what i thought
I was fool who trusted the sun
and tried to chase something
Who was already on the run

And
I was fooled again
My wait didn't end up
It rained whole day and
Sun just didn’t show up